The Raw.Honest.Loved.Project

did i ever think i’d do a blog?
nope.  when i first heard of the word “blog”, it sounded like an alien.  like “alf’s friend, blog.”  or something i had surely heard on mork & mindy. i didn’t get it.  i may still not get it, but i shall do it.  because i am WITH THE TIMES, man.

so, i take photos.  for some reason, i still have a hard time calling myself a photographer/artist/etc., legitimately.  i don’t know what it will take for me to someday be supremely comfortable with saying that….i’m sure it will come.  in any case, the photos i take, and the time i enjoy taking those photos, will be the reason for this blog, ultimately.  i will share these things with you…and quite possibly share with you what i was thinking while capturing those photos, if you care to know.  which, often, i can pretty much guarantee you, will be absurd.

initially, i’ll just tell you a bit about me.  i am creeping up on age 35.  i don’t care that women aren’t supposed to tell their age…whatever…i’m almost 35, and i’m okay with it.  it’s a pretty good time in my life.  i have an amazing, beautiful, smart, witty, hilarious daughter who is 12.  sometimes i still cannot believe that i am the mom of a pre-teen.  it’s pretty weird.  i also have a 16mo old son who is adorable and getting funnier and funnier every day.  i also have a super supportive, loving, incredibly decent man (and the father of my son) in my life.  i am thankful for these three humans every single second of every day. they’re the coolest.

why photography for me?
well, i’ve wanted to be a photographer ever since my grandfather put a camera in my hands at the age of five…
nope.  that’s not true.
i feel like everyone has some story like that, but, that’s not mine.  it hasn’t been something i’ve somehow always desired to do.  i actually had not a clue what i wanted to do as a career for what feels like forever.  brief history: i got married at 19.  that was a bad idea that i stuck with and tried to make work for ten years.  my awesome daughter came from that, so, not all was lost.  but, the majority of my childhood + the majority of my marriage = not happy.  i didn’t have pursuits.  i didn’t have the motivation to have any pursuits of my own.  i just was stagnant.  people kind of had my life mapped out for me and i just was living it.  annnnnnyway, i got divorced almost five years ago.  guess what?  i started taking lots of photos five years ago.  i was finding myself.  i was enjoying my life.  and, apparently, when i am in a happy place, i love to take photos.  THAT, my friends, is what started this.  finding myself as a struggling single parent who was not so keen on the idea of working in coffee shops and doing makeup for the rest of my years to support us…that’s what then kicked this all in motion.  i started thinking about attending college…i didn’t know for what…it ended up being a pretty big epiphany the day that i realized that i could go to school for photography and quite possibly support my daughter and i through that.  there really was a “whaaaaaaaaaaaat?!?!” moment that i went through. it was a pretty good moment.

in any case, here i am.  photography makes me happy.  it gives me a very natural high that i absolutely love.  i even love the editing process, which is kind of weird.
the main thing about myself and capturing photos: if you, as the viewer, do not end up feeling something or being told a story through them, i’m doing something wrong.  that is my ultimate goal.  to tell a story.  to show emotion through photos.  hopefully, i can always achieve that.  if not, i need to reevaluate the shoots that i am spending my time and energy on.

so, yeah.  i’ll be posting photos of upcoming shoots.  i likely will not have another super long write-up like this one, unless you have questions you care to ask.  if so, ask away.

thanks for reading.  i feel like i just wrote some weird diary page for you.

here are those people i was telling you about…

daughter. weirdo. just like her mom. (this is not the best quality photo i’ve taken of her, but it’s pretty accurate…)

son. told you…adorable.

man. supportive AND handsome. ❤

myself…in a nutshell.

myself with my current hair.
i obviously do not take quality self-portraits. sorry ’bout that.